Day 19

This post is dedicated to Mrs. Clough. She confirmed that my blogging abilities sucked, therefore, I told her I would be posting in her honor ;). Part of the reason I haven't been posting is because I have been going through a hard time these past few weeks and I didn't want to write a bunch of negative stuff for you to read. Plus writing about the negative stuff while I am going through it sort of makes me feel even worse. However, I do want to document what I can so I will write about my experience.

Week one post op was extremely painful. If anyone remembers from earlier posts, I had your not so normal complications for this surgery. Why is that? Well, my mom told me that when the surgery was over, the doctor came out extremely happy for 2 reasons:

#1 He said the surgery went flawlessly. He said he hadn't had a case like mine in YEARS. There were 0 complications.

#2 It was his first time to do this type of surgery solo because the assistant bailed on him that same day. But, he said, it was not such a bad thing because a lot of the time, working with the assistant would slow him down.

A few days later, the Doctor told my mom that he has never had a patient like me in his 800+ orthognathic surgeries because of what unfolded next.

So when I woke up from surgery, the first thing I tried to do was jump out of bed. I don't know why! I tried to escape multiple times...until the Doctor all of the sudden came into view and told me that everything had gone very well and I was out of surgery. Then I settled down and noticed all the pain...

Apparently the Doctor did such a fabulous job that he didn't do as much nerve damage as is usual for this surgery so I was in quite a bit of pain. Normal hospital stay is 1 night only. I stayed 2 nights and went to the ER on the third. All the while, the nurses (and the Doctor) were astounded at how much feeling I had regained and pain I was experiencing.

Despite all the pain, the first week was really a haze. Even though I was lucid through it all, I also slept a LOT so it went by really fast and was a blur.

The beginning of week 2 was very good. After all we had finally gotten in control of my pain. But this also meant, decreasing my meds which was a very difficult process. The doctor was afraid my body would get addicted to them so his goal was to have me off meds ASAP. Less meds in my case meant more pain and uncomfortableness in the latter part of week two, which I why I posted more in the beginning and then suddenly stopped.

Week 3 was even worse, because I had to do the rubber bands. Those $*%&^#*(#^*#$ hurt SO BAD. They felt like they were pulling out my teeth AND they pulled my mandible in a way that caused a lot of pressure to my temporomandibular joint. This caused INTENSE pressure for the joint which resulted in painful headaches around the ear area that were not controlled by the meds (which were few and liquid).

This also meant I was on a strictly liquid diet. I lost about a pound a day. Also, I was able to talk, but not allowed to because doing so under the enormous strain my jaws were under could case fibrous union to occur which means that instead of bone growing in to replace the gaps in my jaws, fibrous tissue would grow in. Not bone. Not good. That was pretty depressing. I couldn't eat, drink, or communicate normally while having intense pain not controlled completely by meds. You can see why I didn't want to write about it at the time.

So naturally I was very happy when I got them off. Much to my displeasure, however, the pain did not stop. I became very anxious, especially because I didn't want to keep taking my meds. I think I spent most of my waking hours of that day in bed with hot compresses on.

This helped very much with the swelling, but not so much for my morale. This is why I am lucky to have an incredibly loving family. They know how to cheer me up and get me out of bed and out on the streets.

Walking around is strongly encouraged as soon as possible after the surgery so I have tried to stay busy. I just didn't realize how hard that could be. I mean, when you don't feel good, you don't want to do much. At least in my case...pain in my head seems to paralyze me in a way.

Yesterday I had pain pretty much all day and night. It was my aunt's birthday party that night and I almost thought about not going because I was so tired and meh. But I knew being around family would cheer me up and guess what? IT DID! So much! Laughter really is the best medicine. And my grandma's homeopathic healing of course. (If you want to know more about that, let me know.)

I ate so much too. Baked beans, green beans and even some BRISKET (very finely chopped and with plenty of sauce to help it go down). OMG do you know how longs it has been since I had red meat??? I also ate all the cheese and sauce from half a slice of pizza, which doesn't really sound that gratifying, but it was OH SO GOOD. Then I had a little bit of some tres leches cake (mostly the whipped cream).

And guess what? All of that food and therapy (both homeopathic and non) must've done me right because this is the first morning in 3 weeks I have not woken up in pain. It feels so good to not have to have painkillers for breakfast with applesauce. I am so happy. If this keeps up, I will be more than ready to start work on Wednesday.

I have been having a hard time sleeping since last Saturday. Most nights not until 2..sometimes 3 or later even if I am walking around all day which has added to my plight (my record was 5 am) but my mom thinks that will settle itself after my first day back. I think I have to agree. I know there will be MUCH to do when I return.

So I will have a few more sessions with my grandmother and another visit to the Doctor this week to clear me for Wednesday. I'm ready to see everyone at work. I miss you guys a lot!

So to end this post, I will add some before and after xray photos. When swelling goes down a bit more, I will do a before and after of my face in the flesh. These xrays were taken in November of last year (2013).

Before:

This was take prior to orthodontic treatment as well.See how far back bottom jaw is in comparison to the top?

After

If you look closely, you can see where the gap in my lower jaw right under the last molar. 10mm according to Dr. McPhillps.

 Before:

Here my whole mouth/jaw seems lopsided to the left of the picture (to the right according to the xray). As far as I remember, I was sitting up straight and perfectly still for this photo. You can even faintly see my cervical spine. Notice how the molars in the back aren't lining up.

After:

Say hello to my titanium screws! Notice how much more even in comparison to the before photo.

I don't have a before photo from this angle, but here is another view of the work done. 

Day 8 Post Op

Today was a good day. Definitely one of the better ones since the surgery. I had my Doctor appointment today and I forgot to ask about the x-rays :( But the good news is I'm not in rubber bands yet! *phew* I see him again Monday and he is planning on putting them on then. He told me to take 2 hydrocodone to prepare for that visit...rubber bands will not be pleasant. He says I may not need them for the whole 7 days, but we shall see. This also means I will probably not be coming back to work next week. Honestly, I didn't feel ready to come back just yet, so I wasn't entirely disappointed to hear that. 

He also examined the super painful spot in the back right side of my mouth where he made the incision. He thinks there may be a canker sore (more of an ulcer at this stage) that developed from all the trauma so he has prescribed me some meds for that. I can already feel a difference, so I think he was correct in his diagnosis.

The other topic covered was for me to gradually taper off the hydrocodone. I'm afraid I was too eager in this endeavor and started experiencing withdrawal symptoms early this evening. I felt so much pain and just ill like I was coming down with something. Not a nice feeling at all. So I had to take one, but I've developed a plan for how to taper off without causing such a drastic negative effect. 

Fortunately, I was well again for when Larra came to visit. That definitely lifted my spirits. I am very grateful for her visit (I had missed you so much Larrums!)  and for all the wonderful get well wishes and gifts from my coworkers. Thank you so much guys! It meant SO much and made me miss ya'll more! 

I would like to take a moment to say thank you to everyone who has come by to see me or who has come by to help take care of me. I know it has helped my recovery and my spirits just having all this support from people who care about me. If you'd like to come by and haven't yet just text me and we can coordinate something.

Now random picture time:

Day 7 Post Op

Ok I have officially deemed myself the worst blogger ever. I will try to be more consistent these next few days. I'm having a hard time remembering things (probably the meds) so to summarize:

Sunday: I ended up going to the doctor's office again in the morning because I have this horrible pain in the back right side of my mouth where my wisdom teeth used to be. That's actually where he made the incision for my lower jaw. Even though it looked pretty bad (I made my dad take a picture of it) the doctor said it looked okay and that it would heal. He also commented on how quickly I was healing...if this is healing quickly, then I would hate to know what healing slowly would be like, because I am definitely not feeling very healed.

Monday: It was very hard to wake up. Usually I can't sleep in, but lately, I've been sleeping SO GOOD. SO SO SO GOOD! (This might be partly attributed to meds also...) I tried to imagine what it would be like to breathe better before the surgery, and I just couldn't. How could I know what it felt like if I've never experienced it. Now that I am living it, it is so amazing! I can sleep on my back and breathe perfectly through my nostrils. Actually, my left nostril is still pretty stuffed up, probably blocked with allergies/scabs, but even so, I can breathe more deeply that I could even imagine. I just love that I can sleep on my back and don't have to turn on my shoulder anymore. I think that caused me a lot of stress, pain and sleepless nights just because it was so uncomfortable.

Anyway, I spent most of the day in bed, sleeping. I did try my hand at making something to eat. My parents have that awesome blender kind of like the vita mix and it has a recipe book for soups. It's been a lifesaver. So I made a mushroom and walnut soup. The soup itself has pieces of onion in it (kind of like french onion soup) but of course I had to blend mine completely. I ended up blending it with mashed potatoes and tilapia. AND IT WAS DELICIOUS!!!! I know it sounds gross but think about it...The rest of the family used the soup as a topping for the tilapia and ate the mashed potatoes on the side. Practically the same thing....

Tuesday: The instructions for recovery state that I should walk around and I haven't been doing much of that, so today I decided to run some errands with my mom. We took meds with us and we picked some things up from my apartment and settled some things with my OLD apartment, etc, etc.

Honestly I am wiped out. I am a bit intimidated by the idea of starting work next week, just based off of today. I have another follow up appointment tomorrow and I suppose I will find out if he will start me on the rubber bands for a week or not. He decided to put off the rubber bands because of the rough start I had post op. Since I was hooked up to the IV for longer than usual receiving so many meds and fluids, my swelling has been very stubborn. This has made biting down very difficult and is causing me to bite the inside of my mouth when I do (which is contributing to the awful pain that is still occurring in the back right side of my mouth that I saw him for on Sunday).

Anyway, I'm sure I'll found out tomorrow. I've heard it can be painful so I'm a bit nervous but we'll see. I'm going to ask the doctor for the xrays of before and after so I can post. Once the swelling goes down, I will post before/after pictures of my actual face.

Til next time!

p.s. I know a few people told me they weren't able to leave comments but I've fixed that so feel free to express your thoughts or ask away if you have questions!

Day 4 Post Op

Hello everyone! Sorry I haven't written in a while. I have had quite the rough time these past few days. And again, I am highly medicated so I apologize for any typos or weird wording during this post. I still can't get all my thoughts straight or concise.

So last time I wrote that I might get to go home (this was on Thursday). I had been in a lot of pain earlier that day as the oral medication wasn't doing much to relieve my symptoms and the IV medication lasted only for a while. By the time Dr. McPhillips came to see me I was feeling pretty good since they had just given me something with steroids to help with the swelling. He said it was up to me whether to stay or go. I decided that being home with my family would lift my spirits and help me recover so we left the hospital around 7.

During the car ride home, my face started throbbing again. By the time I got home my pain started steadily increasing again. I loved seeing my family and it definitely brought my spirits up. But ultimately we ended up going to the ER that night because the pain was just unbearable.

Luckily the ER was pretty quiet so I was admitted almost immediately. We were there until about 5am. I didn't want to leave because I was  worried the pain still wasn't under control but I had a follow up appointment at 10 with the surgeon so that gave me some comfort.

We woke up at 9 after just 4 hours of sleep and my pain had already increased. By the time we got to his office I sort of had a breakdown because of everything that was going on. He was upset because he said we could've come into the office instead of the ER and he could've treated me, but we didn't know. I told him we didn't want to bother him and he said that I wasn't a bother, in fact, I was the only patient he was seeing that day. He is a wonderful doctor and I recommend him to anyone seeking maxillofacial surgery.

He proceeded to treat me with an IV in his office, rehydrating me and giving me some pain medication. He also gave me some shots to numb my entire mouth that were supposed to last 6 to 12 hours.

I was in such good spirits after that we went to IHOP and I had some mashed potatoes with gravy and smoothie king. Then we went to Ross so that I could walk around a bit (he encourages walking as much as possible to help with the healing process). Long story short, I was back at his office at 5pm because I still couldn't control the pain, despite having taken 6 hydrocodone and all my other medications. When the Dr. heard that, he was alarmed and said he has never had a patient go through this before, and he's done over 800 of these surgeries. He treated me again like he did before and then he took out my nasal splints. I've heard that it feels like having your brain ripped out of your head, but honestly, it barely hurt in comparison to the pain I've been having. Then he prescribed some stronger meds to help with the pain management. I had a very rough night again last night because I did not feel like it was working. Luckily the pain meds knocked me out and apparently I slept for about 5 hours straight. I woke up at 4 this morning and the pain was not unbearable. I woke up again at 10 and I have been feeling okay ever since.

The strangest thing is that I feel drowsy all the time so I will slip into a dream state even though I'm not really completely asleep. Every time I wake up I feel disoriented. But I have family around so it's not scary. And the food situation is not bad at all. I don't even feel like eating solid food because of the pain so my smoothies are hitting the spot.

Anyway, sorry for the super long post but it has been very eventful since the last post. I am feeling better now though and I am confident that I will keep improving. Once again, I'd like to thank all my family and friends who have been contacting me and helping me through this tough time. Especially the love of my life, Angelo, who has been here with me even when I'm passed out to the point where my parents have to tell him to go to sleep and that I'll be okay. And also a shout out to my wonderful parents who have gone through all the ups and downs with me, only sleeping when I sleep, and keeping my spirits up by showing me their endless love. I would never have been able to do this without you. And of course I want to thank God that I even had the opportunity to have this procedure done and that I have an amazing support system made up of family and friends who will help me get through this. I am so blessed and grateful.

There are so many other things I'd like to share with you but for the sake of not making this post any longer, now I'll post what you really want to see since you haven't heard from me in a while... Pictures:

I'LL COME AFTER YOU IN YOUR DREAMS!! My dad and I.

Eating my delicious large smoothie king. Yes, I finished it ALL.

 My first day at the hospital: Taryn came to visit and brought me some presents to keep my spirit up. 

 Right after surgery, they have these ice packs on my cheeks to help with the swelling.

 My second night there: My love and I posing with a turtle pillow that Taryn brought me. I love his smile here!

 Self explanatory lol

 Back at home, Thursday night. I'm super swollen and in pain. And no, I can't close my mouth lol

 This syringe has been a lifesaver. Makes eating easier since I can feel my lips. I'm less likely to make a mess this way.

 A side view of my face, on the way to the doctor's office.

 Watson and I.

Hanging out with Biscuit with my AMAZING Tervis cup that Jennifer got for me. Aside from the syringe, it is the only cup I can drink out of without making a huge mess. It's kind of like an adult sippy cup....

Day two post op

Hey everyone! I haven't had much of a chance to write before now. I'm still at the hospital in quite a bit of pain. I'll try to do my best to summarize the past 2 days but I must apologize if my written communication isn't at 100% yet since I am still groggy.

Tuesday the 16th I arrived at 5am to register and go through all the pre-op, including answering more medical history questions and meeting with the anesthesiologist and surgeon. I also got my fancy surgery garb:

After this they gave me a sedative and that's pretty much all I remember until they woke me up in the recovery room. I remember being very disoriented and trying to get up and leave, but of course they didn't let me. Next thing I remember is my surgeon holding onto my hand and letting me know everything went perfectly. I was in and out of consciousness at this point and this is when I realized I had pretty intense pain.

So here is where the good news and bad news comes to play. Good news is, that my surgery went so well that my nerve damage was not very extensive which means I will have a speedier recovery of my senses. Bad news is...I feel a LOT of pain. I wasn't prepared for this at all.

Because of the pain, I had to stay a second night in the hospital but on the bright side, I was able to hit all the other milestones for being discharged. If I can get my pain down I can leave today to go home, which will be great because it's my dad's birthday today! LOVE YOU DAD!!

I have been able to sleep because most of the medications make me groggy, so at least there's that as well. And I can breathe! My nose is pretty numb and congested feeling, but even so, I have much better breathing than before.

Long story short, these past 2 days have been very trying, but I've had so much support from friends and family and the wonderful nursing staff, so it's still been a good experience. These have been my symptoms:

Nose: Stuffy, congested and numb. But I can still breathe better than before. I have nasal splints in which is probably what is making it possible for me to breathe.

Throat: Was sore after surgery kind of like when you are getting a cold or tonsilitis or something. This is from the breathing tube. This is what people usually complain about as being uncomfortable after this kind of surgery, at least from what I've heard. For me, this pain was secondary to the rest of my mouth.

Jaws: I was unfortunate enough to be able to feel every incision that was made. Or at least that's what it feels like. The most painful one is this stitch on the roof of my mouth. It is very painful, and every time I swallow it seems to flare up and aggravate the rest of my mouth too.

Face: Mostly numb across my cheeks, nose and lips. My tongue is okay though which helps swallowing.

Well it's time for lunch: grits, applesauce, yogurt, ice cream, cranberry juice and water. Yummmm.

More to come later!

10 hours to go time

As I sit here with 10 hours left before my surgery I still can't wrap my head around what's about to happen. I'm excited for all the positive outcomes I will have as a result of my surgery but also nervous about the hurdles I'll face along the way. I'm keeping this blog to keep my family and friends up to date on my progress, and also to provide a window into the experience for others who are also considering orthognathic surgery. I hope it will serve both purposes well :)

I want to thank everyone for your best wishes, your continued support and prayers. I've been preparing for an entire year for this procedure. I know it will greatly improve the quality of my life and I am blessed to even have the opportunity to address my issues so I'd like to thank God for that as well.

I will post as soon as I can after the surgery, with before and after shots. For the time being, here is what I'm having done:

Le Fort I Osteotomy, a Bilateral Sagittal Split Osteotomy (BSSO), and Septoplasty of my deviated septum